Jamey Rodemeyer

14 year old Jamey Rodemeyer commited suicide a few days ago due to being insanely bullied for being gay. And all I can say is, I'm angry and upset. Angry at those who drove a 14 year old to take his own life, and angry at the people who sat by and did nothing to help him. I'm upset at the loss of such a young man, in May he posted a video on youtube entitled "it gets better, I promise" and regularly blogged about the homophobic bullying he suffered at school.

This is supposed to be the 21st century, and yet most of the world is still in the dark ages. People still find the need to ridicule everyone who is just a little bit different from them. Sure we can change laws, but it doesn't stop the hate in people's hearts. It's that hate, which destroys people's lives. It sickens me to know the world is full of darkness.

I know I've used the term homophobic at the beginning of the article, but to be completely honest is it really the right word? To have a phobia of something is to be scared. These people aren't scared at all, it's hate, pure and simple.

There needs to be more support for young people who are suffering from bullying for being gay or trans or just plain different, bullying shouldn't be so rife in this day and age.

The sad thing is, even days after Jamey took his own life, people are still making hateful comments on his videos.

This has to stop.

Rest In Peace Jamey and everyone who has been driven to taking their own life thanks to shit like this.

Rant #2

This is my second rant on here already, the chances of anyone actually reading this is slim in any case, and I need to let off some steam about things. And because I'm a neat freak I'm actually going to number each issue.

        1. Chaz Bono on DWTS - It's already been blogged to death but I don't care. I'm still getting over the fact that in American "land of the free" that there are still such bigotry. With the don't ask don't tell policy being repealed, American are only just coming out the dark ages. But what pisses me off most about the Chaz Bono thing, is the fact the bigots are saying, that it might give kids ideas about transitioning. Well I say good, people need to see more of it. That it's not something that can be swept under the carpet and ignored. If your child is having gender issues, surely its better for them to think that they're not alone and there is people out there who feel the same way? there is one article here " Don't let your kids watch chaz bono " that has particularly pissed me off to the max. To quote said article

"The truth is that Chaz Bono should be empathized with and treated with dignity. Any contribution he makes to the world should be applauded as it would be for any other person.

But Chaz Bono should not be applauded for asserting she is a man (and goes about trying to look like one) any more than a woman who believes she will be happier without arms, has them removed and then continues to assert that she was right all along—her self-concept was that of a double amputee. Now, all is well.

 

Chaz Bono should not be applauded any more than someone who, tragically, believes that his species, rather than gender, is what is amiss and asks a plastic surgeon to build him a tail of flesh harvested from his abdomen. If only a plastic surgeon would acquiesce, all would be well."

Two things are wrong here, firstly through out the article they have been throwing around pronouns calling Chaz he one moment, then to try to further themselves refer to him as she.  Chaz Bono is a man, that is the bottom line.

And secondly, how can you compare gender dysphoria to wanting to be a double amputee or an animal? That is down right ridiculous.  The writer of the article is a psychiatrist?! I think he needs to go back to school and learn the difference. The fact of the matter is transpeople all over the world go through counselling and psychiatric analysis for months sometimes years before they can begin transition, to make sure it is right for them. And to make things worse, this man is saying he would have done anything in his power to stop Chaz from transitioning.

"Make no mistake: I would have gone to the ends of the earth to help Chaz Bono if she had come to me for help.

I would have treated her with dignity and summoned every ounce of my intellect and empathy to explore her psyche with her. I would have pried loose every family secret hidden by the Bonos.

I would have been relentless.

I would have used everything I know about medication to help her.

I would have enlisted the help of every expert I know—some of the world’s best—at everything from endocrinology to hypnosis.

I would have teamed up with a spiritual counselor, if that seemed indicated.

And if all that failed, and if Chaz Bono wanted either to kill herself or to undergo gender reassignment surgery, I would have taken that journey with her, too. I would have talked her parents through the hell of it. We would make the best of it.

Somehow, with enormous compassion and love and God’s help, we would get through it."

Doesn't that remind you of the straight camps?

      2. My mom and certain members of my family - While I've already come out and begun my transition, I need you to stop brushing it under the carpet, it's not a phase, I will not simply get over it. I have to do this, while I'm happier now than I used to be, just because I'm out doesn't mean I can live like this for the rest of my life. I can't go through life looking at the mirror and feeling repulsed at what I see. You take your bodies for granted, you all look in the mirror and see yourself. I look in the mirror and see a woman, and I'm not a woman I am a man.

It hurts me, when you don't use the name I have chosen, or if someone on the street asks you if I'm your son/brother and you say no I'm your daughter/sister, every little thing like that gets to me and knocks me down just that little bit more. Are you always going to do that? Even when I have a flat chest and a full beard are you still going to tell people I'm your daughter/sister, then they can look at me and think I'm a freak, and the shit under their shoe? At the moment I'm in this dark place, and I can't get out because every time I push myself that bit further out, you seem to be doing your hardest to push me back in. I can't live like that.

 

Taking control

I've just read an inspiring blog, which can be found here transfagssexjournals, and it got me thinking, which is never a good thing in my experience. But it made me think about my issues with sex, now I only have two issues, one is the trans thing which is never easy on anyone, and the second is not getting enough. But this blog is so inspiring, this guy is so open about himself, about his sexuality and his body. I wish I could be more like him, now I've had my fair share of NSA fun, but its normally with people I know, and a case of I'm horny, you're horny lets fuck. But this guy is so open about everything, the names he gives his hook-ups, the sex itself (which by the way is hot as fuck), how hes feeling at the time and afterwards. As it says on the side panel of the blog, "We believe that we are all beautiful, hot and sexy in all of our diversity of race, skin color, age, class, gender, size, HIV status, and disability. Because attraction is so diverse there will always be people who want to fuck us or who want us to fuck them." it gave me hope. There will be a time, when not only someone finds me attractive, but I'll also find myself attractive, and I wont struggle to atleast masterbate.

trans, sex and relationships

Ok this post probably won't be "work safe" but oh well.

After a very random conversation with a friend about me being single again I decided maybe this is something for the blog. He wanted to know how my gender identity had affected my relationships and such like.

Well when I first come out I happened to be with a very accepting woman and to completely honest, the sex was amazing, I've always been more a giver than a taker to be fair. Nothing pleases me more than pleasing someone else. Then we parted ways for various reasons and I started seeing another transman, which to be fair I never thought I'd do because I like women, alot. But anyway we started talking as friends at first as most relationships do, then it hit me like a bus.
I liked this guy he was funny, good looking, yadda yadda, so we started dating (awww) then it came to the scary bit, well scary for me, the sex. The sex was fucking fantastic, both being transmen we both understood there would be things we, physcologically, couldnt do. It wasnt awkward or uncomfortable, it was fantastic. Now I'm single again.

Relationships for me, at the moment, are out of the question. I can't form relationships unless I'm already pretty close to the person, so unless I go around dating all my friends, the chances are very slim. Besides the fact, you know it'd be nice to be close to someone and do nice things like spoon them at night and cook for them things like that, I actually think I'm fine without a relationship, but one thing I can't go without is sex! I have the sex drive of a god, heavens help me when I start T.

Now plenty of transguys have issues when it comes to their "bits" me included, but that shouldnt mean we can't have a sex life so lets think of some ideas, remember theres no wrong or right when it comes to getting your rocks off (as long as its consensual of course)

anal - I know a few transguys who don't like anything going near their errm front, but many guys, trans and bio, do enjoy a bit of bumming. My advice is take it nice and slow, plenty of water based lube, use condoms, latex gloves etc and always change the condom/glove before it goes near any other part of the body. Safe sex and all that.

Cock sucking - I have a very deep connection with my cock even though its not physically attached, so watching someone suck it, play with it etc is a very big turn on.

Rimming - This actually probably should be up there in the anal bit, but I have a slight problem in the fact I cant do penetration, last time I tried I squealed and ran up the bed. But I am quite partial to a rim job (Y)

Kissing- Not just for the mouth, suggest to your partner to try kissing you, everywhere.

General exploring - No one can tell you how to have sex, nothing is ever that simple. The best way to find out what works for you is to try new things. If you don't know where you like to be touched, take yourself to bed and find out.

Thats all really I can think of for the time being, I'll update as I find out more. As I said before everyones different. But find out things, educate yourself.

Anyway I erm gotta go....;)

D.I.Y packer

I promised a step by step guide to the gel filled condom packer, so here it is. Enjoy:

You'll need:

12 or so condoms
1 big tub/tube of cheap hair gel
1 nylon stocking

Tools:

A tablespoon, scoop or funnel
A table, tray, something you can wipe clean afterwards.

Step one - Balls

Scoop a blob or so of the hair gel into the bottom of a partially unrolled condom. When it looks right, size wise for a testicle, tie the condom with a simple knot.

Step two - More balls

Step on all over again. Try to get it as close in size of the first one. It doesn't have to be perfect, even bio-guys dont all have even sized balls.

Step three - Junk gunk

Now we're actually at the dick stage! Take a third condom and do like what you did in the first two steps, but this time add more gel. Once again, be as realistic as possible, not too big. We all want to be hung like horses but we can't walk around with a boner.

Step four - Wrap those puppies!

Take a few more condoms and wrap everything up again. keep them seperate, we don't stick them together till the end. Generally the more condoms you use the firmer they get. Ideally the balls should be firmer than the dick.

*Tip: add one more slop of gel inside the last condom to go on the outside of the testicles, for that slippery round the bag feeling.*

Step five - the beginning of the end

Tie the loose ends of the balls together. Try to get them to hang nicely not too lopsided.

Step six- The end

This is the bit where it gets complex so let's break it down some more:

1. Fine your stocking, drop both balls into the toe.
2. Leave the balls a bit of room and tie a knot.
3. Drop in your dick. at the end of your dick, give the stocking a 360 degree twist.
4. Turn the stocking inside out, back over the dick and balls.
5. Finish however you like. I personally sew mine shut to stop it unravelling.

Last notes

• If you used hair gel with a scent, don't worry it'll fade.
• wash it or it will go funkkkaay.
• If you put too much pressure on it (it does take a lot) and it bursts don't worry you're not bleeding to death but yu might want to wash yourself afterwards.
• If you live with your parents, take it out of your pants before you leave them lying in the bathroom.
• Don't leave it by your bed at night, it feels horrible to stand on when getting out of bed in the dark for a pee.

And there we have it, a relatively cheap home made packer. Once again don't forget to secure it in place somehow.

Live long and prosper!!

Soft Packing

Well wev've talked about coming out and binding so far, so now were going to talk about packing! No nt packing for your holidays, packing your pants! There's plenty of ways ways to pack, rolled up socks, the gell filled condom (post later) soft packers, dual use, prosthetics, stand-to-pee (STP). I'll try to explain these later on but now some advice:

The majority of bio-guys are growers not showers, which means their junk gets bigger when it's erect. Ideally you should be packing big enough to look like somethings there but not so big that you look like you're walking around with an erection!

And secondly, find something to secure it with, safety pin, harness, jock strap, briefs. Believe me, its not nice to walk down the street and have your packer, dick, junk, fall out of your boxers and wriggle it's way down your trouser leg.

So lets get down to it then:

Rolled up sock

Pretty straight forward I think. Basically take a sock, roll it up, and fasten it inside your underwear with a safety pin. Try not to use gym/sports socks however, they tend to look a bit too bulgy.

The gel filled condom

I'm actually going to leave this one for now, mainly because I'm going to do a step by step guide to this in the next post.

Soft packers

Now this is starting to get a bit more complex.

Soft packers are more realistic than the last two methods. They come in different materials, sillicone, cyber skin, way too many to list, but il give a brief list of what I've used in the past. Links to american websites are shown using US dollars in the prices and UK sites are shown using UK pounds.

1)
Name: Packy
Company: Mango Products
Colours: Pink, (limited other colours)
Sizes and Prices: 31/2 - $11.95 51/2 - $16.95

2)
Name: Soft Pack
Company: Toys in babeland (look under dildos)
Colours: Vanilla, Mocha
Sizes and Prices: Mini - $16.00 Small - $18.00 Medium - $20.00 Large - $22.00

3)
Name: Packy
Company: Early2bed
Colours: Pink, Vanilla, Caramel
Sizes and Prices: Small- $12.00 Medium- $14.00 Large - $16.00

4)
Name: Limpy
Comany: Love Honey
Colours: Pink
Sizes and Prices:Extra small- £11.99 Small - £12.99 Medium - 13.99 Large - £14.99

So those are the ones I have used to soft pack. *Please not, some people have had problems ordering from mango products due to a back log of orders*

By all means search around, those four sites aren't the only ones out there selling packers.

Stay tuned for the instructions on the gel filled condom!

Back in the habit

If you read my other post about binding you'll know I've just put my binder on. I haven't worn it in a couple of weeks at all, so putting it back on was like getting into a really comfortable pair of pajamas. The reason I havent worn it, is quite simply I had my nipple pierced! *ouch* now I know what you're thinking, if you're trying to pass as male why on earth would you have your nipple pierced? Well, why not? many bio guys (biological men) have theirs done, why can't I?
But in all seriousness (as serious as I get) I hate my chest, absolutely hate it, don't get me wrong I love tits (excuse the language) just not on me. But my nipple bar is one thing I can say I like about my chest now. Hopefully my man boobs won't be around forever, but in the mean time its nice to have one thing I can say I like about them. Besides no one is going to see it but me.

Ok rant over.

Peace out \/